Grieving the losses, yet grateful

Let's dive straight in:

Thoughts from Judy:

If you remember, I was diagnosed by a neurologist with motor neurone disease on the 30th of July last year. It is bulbar onset, which means the degeneration of the nerves started with those connecting my brain stem to the tongue and throat muscles, so I struggle with eating and talking, and the weakness has started spreading to my limbs.

Recently, I've had times of grieving, grieving the losses. Loss of normal conversation, since my speech is slower and softer, with less variation in pitch. Loss of robust fellowship over meals, since I eat slowly and take long over mouthfuls. Loss of being able to connect with kids, from young to teens. The loss of my profession. It's really hard. The weakness in my hands and arms has thankfully stabilised and doesn't seem to be getting worse.

Things are changing, like Ian has to make phone calls for me and conversations are slower and not over a meal. I still go into shops and ask for things, but it requires courage, because people aren't always patient. 

It's easy to slip into depression, but I have to make the choice to live positively, to be grateful, to show up, to boast in my weaknesses, because when I am weak, then He is strong. 

God is still using us profoundly. It is bitter-sweet. My relationships with others, especially Ian, are more tender, and deeper, so precious. It seems our ministry has more impact because of my condition. Although it's harder for people to hear what I say, they listen closely, and it seems weightier. Plus, I choose my words carefully now. I can't afford to waste any! 😂

I'm so grateful for our family, this beautiful town, the community, our home at 82 Leadwood Rd, and friends. Our boundaries have fallen in pleasant places. I'm grateful that my symptoms are progressing slowly, and that it is a disease with which one doesn't really feel ill. I'm not in much pain, and we have time, time to savour relationships and beauty.

This week, I am getting a tablet and software that I will start using to communicate. I will eventually do everything on it, but for now I am just going to start getting used to it speaking for me. They prefer you to get used to using it before you absolutely have to. So that will be interesting and fun. I 'banked' my voice last year, and software will 'repair' it, and then the tablet will speak in 'my voice'.

Thoughts from Ian:

It is the end of October and I am sitting at my desk in a winter jacket! So different from Pretoria's predictable weather. But we know this is where we are meant to be, and I'm thoroughly enjoying the meaningful relationships I have formed with several of the men in the community.

Our friendship with Cornelius and Prima has led me to look into getting involved with their NPO, Beats and Books. (Click here for details). It is turning out to be a very exciting and rewarding opportunity. We will most likely have more details in the next blog. 

Fishing has not yet picked up, but that makes the anticipation all the sweeter. 

I also have my emotional times over Judy's health, mourning the loss of lively conversations over meals, but we rejoice in the sovereignity of God in the journey.   

I have recently completed a course called Mentoring with Purpose, exploring how neuroscience can assist in the mentoring process. I am also looking into a formal international qualification in Coaching. This is both exciting and daunting, as I am trusting for this to lead to a source of income from this that I love doing. 

Backabuddy

Amy, our daughter, has created a backabuddy account to raise funds for Judy's voice system. There is already enough for the tablet and software, and if you want to contribute further to get the eye-tracking system that might be needed when she can't use her hands any more, here is the link.

Backabuddy for Judy

A varied trip 

In late August-early September, we did a trip to Namaqualand to see the flowers. We did the trip with Ian's sister, Dawn and her husband, Alan, and parts of the trip with Ian's brother, Stuart, and his wife, Linda. It was glorious to see the minute detail of the creativity of God.

 

Then we went to Cape Town for a few days to see Amy and William, and then up to Middelburg, Mpumalanga, to see Heather, Nathan and the girls, one of whom, Abby Faith is brand new!!

We continue to enjoy having David and Robynne close by, and have had some good times with them, sometimes doing something, and sometimes doing nothing at all. Robynne has finally had her Masters awarded, and they are looking to buy property in PE (Gqeberha).

Ministry

We are co-leading a course called Life Plan for Couples, which extends an existing course to being suitable for couples. What a blessing to be involved in the lives of seven dynamic couples, seeking to understand their Life Plan, and to support their spouses in living out theirs more fully.

We are walking several meaningful journeys with individuals and couples, one of whom Ian meets with online, is from Michigan, USA.

We love our home, and are delighted to see it is being used often - for bridal shower, house church (life group), courses, games evenings for young adults, and generally a safe place for people to be in. Please pray for the sale of our home in Pretoria as we still need to buy this home from Jan. 

Creativity

Ian hauled out his camera for our trip to Namaqualand, and you can see some of the results above. 

Judy recently completed a quilt for David and Robynne.

Prayer items

Details of Ian's involvement with Beats and Books

Clarity for Ian on Mentoring / Coaching qualifications. 

Yes, Judy's health and how we find rest from God in the journey. 

The sale of our Pretoria home, preferably to an investor, so the current tenants can stay.

THANK YOU!!